The By-laws of life

In this ordered and structured world of ours there exists undefined laws within man's rigid frame.

Consider.
Lightning may strike anywhere it wants. It is a law firmly set within earths ordered structured.
You dont believe me? Look under the Earth's constitution for lightning.
The entire earth is permitted table for Zeus's practice.
That is acceptable.
What is unacceptable is found within the undefined laws.
Lightning may not strike twice in the same place.
Laws within laws.
Earth spins on merging a cocktail of defined and the undefined.

Defined.
You may have an orgasm during sex.
Undefined.
The female must achieve one, preferably more, before the man may gasp his first, usually last climax for the sex to be deemed memory worthy.

Defined.
Sounds rarely kill.
Undefined.
If you hear a gunshot duck.
If you hear another gun shot start running.
If you hear a third gunshot really start running.
If you're in your apartment during the gunshots there is no point running.
And so on and so forth.

I call them the bylaws of life.
These undefined and yet resolute laws which we all somehow know and follow. All through life we are expected to obey them and stick to the formula. Common sense , our annoying pro bono lawyer,advises us too.
Deviating from the rule is simply unwise as made apparent by the law beneath.
You may not re-accept a boyfriend/girlfriend who has dumped you three times for a better fish only to return when the urge for Tilapia (that would be you) resurfaces.
See?
Laws I tell you.

The bylaws are here to stay. Make no mistake about it.
There actually is a bylaw about that but here is not the place to point it out.
You see this post isn't about defining the bylaws; it is about reporting a crime against them.
Last week a group of individuals callously broke one of the sacred and most cardinal rules in the bylaws.
These men where armed robbers.
Nothing wrong there.
My mum was robbed by these men.
It happens.
Twice.
In the same day.
Now that.... is unacceptable.

Twice in a day?
What kind of idiotic armed robber does that?
There is a clear rule stating that thieves may not rob a person twice.
It's right there, next to the law that you may not kill a person twice. Didn't they read the constitution? Is there no such thing as honor amongst thieves. Where they that unlucky at the gambling booth.
Sigh I disgress. I am yet to tell the tale. Don't get your hopes up though. It reallyis an annoying story.


My mum, (God bles her sexy soul) was off to work one happy day, the sun was in the sky, birds were twittering and Risse had scored a lovely goal for Chelsea the night before. Everything seemed perfect when, suddenly, she was stopped by these creeps of the night in broad daylight.
My mum was nice; she gave them everything they asked off her. Her money. Her purse. Her phone. The name of her worst son (Carl). Everything they asked for she handed over.
Impressed with her cooperation they let her drive on to work.
Up unto that point the story seemed ordinary.
What was weird is 7 hours later as she returned from work (yes my mum actually stayed in the office and worked. And y'all cal me crazy), whistling "Jesus na baba" they hopped out of the bushes and pulled her up again.

This time all my mum had was 50 Naira.
See why the "Once a day" law is there?

Fortunately everything thereafter stayed though to the rules of life.
20 metres after the robbery was a Police post with armed Police men seating down. They greeted her cheerfully as she approached.

Wihout her 50 Niara she couldnt tip them!